aka Ivanna Screwdriver doesn’t ride bikes anymore (and she sure as shit don’t race no fuckin’ bikes, either) but is happy to be on the team helping those bitches bring in those results as the team mechanic, heckler, and soigneur.
- Favorite tools: basic voddy/OJ screwdriver, her Paragon Machine Works ti bottle opener, and the three-way.
- Favorite bike ride: to the beer store.
- Turn-ons: a well-lubricated bike chain, dudes who wait until the women who are racing to finish racing before they warm up on the race course.
- Turn-offs: rusty and/or seized nipples, race promoters who allow dudes to warm up on the race course before the women have finished racing.
- What she does when she’s not not riding bikes: choking bitches, fixing bikes, and taking mid-afternoon naps. Sometimes she runs, too1.
- Favorite place to wear her Levi’s ® jorts: Everywhere. She’s an undercover nevernude.
1From the cops.